


I'd Like a Return, Please

by Othalla



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Force Ghost Obi-Wan Kenobi, Gen, Han Solo is Having a Bad Day, Haunting, Humor, Vending Machines Not Doing Their Jobs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-14
Updated: 2018-02-14
Packaged: 2019-03-18 07:11:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13676799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Othalla/pseuds/Othalla
Summary: Han does not appreciate being haunted.





	I'd Like a Return, Please

**Author's Note:**

  * For [outruntheavalanche](https://archiveofourown.org/users/outruntheavalanche/gifts).



> This was fun to write, and I hope you like it! :)
> 
> [Rosefox](https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosefox) helped look this fic over for grammar :)

Today is not Han’s day.

“You know, I don’t think that’s very helpful.”

Han’s scowl grows deeper. Petulantly, he kicks the hull of the piece of shit vending machine that just ate his last credit, because he can and it deserves it. 

“I’m not talking to you,” he says to the old man that’s definitely not haunting him because that would be  _ stupid _ .

“Very mature.” The man smiles dickishly. Han’s sure that Luke would call it kind, but Luke was raised in a barn and that smile is nothing if not condescending. Han does not appreciate dickishly condescending old men staring at him in a very  _ not at all haunting  _ manner because that would be  _ weird _ . Han likes  _ normal _ . 

Han wants to get off this planet and get back to being a proper smuggler instead of the go-to rescue guy he’s turned into. People apparently feel the need to send him on missions just because he likes the way Leia sneers at him sometimes. Missions that Chewie accepts before Han’s able to get a word of protests in, because Chewie is secretly a big softie, and he  _ likes these people _ .

Seriously, fuck Han’s life.

“No one asked you, gramps,” he says and makes a shooing motion with his hands. “Now scuttle off and bother someone else.”

The man neatly folds his hands inside his oversized sleeves, obviously settling in to not go anywhere.

“The Force works in mysterious ways,” he says, like it’s supposed to provide Han with some profound insight. “It led me to you, son. I trust we’ll learn why at some point. Have faith.”

Han almost screams in frustration. Fucking  _ Force bullshit _ . Give him some ordinary religious people bullshit every day, at least those fanatics stay properly dead when they die, instead of going around haunting innocent people who  _ deserve better _ .

“I hate you,” Han says, just to make it clear. Because it’s true and he does.

 


End file.
